i am sorry for this post but it has been troubling me for years now on why me and him cant be friends..... after years of searching along with trial and error i have found my answer
as 2018 came to an end
i made a mistake of trying to be friends with a person that i really should have not...
what happened?
i found out we litterally have nothing in common
he said i was trying to controle it when i was stating this
in the end he blamed me in his anger
i said don't you dare say that - or something
he felt it was ok to say it because he was pissed off at me
i said no that is not ok
he blocked me like the child he was - again
i now know... more... now.... that i am not suppose to be his friend nor try to befriend him... to try to work things out...... it is impossible
i found this picture quote which makes it all clear to me
i continue to find excuses and we continue to block each other
6 years gone by
an endless cycle of blocking and reaching out only to be blocked again..... we stopped talking for months now.... so i know one more block and i will stop talking to him for more than 4 or 6 months now....... i know eventually i will not go back and try to be his friend
for years i said to myself i should not go back
why did i go back?
he projected his reality to where i would go back to him
he did it once again
he shaped his reality
only now this time... i hope is the final time i wont go back
i am done
i know i said this last time but... i really feel this is the year i wont go back
i now know he does not walk the same path and was upset and whined to me about... why does it have to be these books only... because i trust no other source and neither do other thelemites.... i was wanred to not trust outside sources and for good reason...... even my spirit guides have wanred me of this too
i left facebook and insta for two or three weeks now
avoiding my ex's profile picture... he changed it to a monster that was yelling..... i felt his rage to me... besides his profile does not match mine... we argued about this before and felt it was ok to be seperate worlds........... no i am afraid that is not how friendships work... well, to me at least....
to me friends must have something in common to form a bond... me and this guy had absolutlty nothing... not faith, not games, not art... he was hardcore horror fan while i was not.... i am a lightworker and he is not.... he never encountered a lightworker before and well his vibe and mine does not match
i can see that after he complained to me about the books i read to evolve myself.... i am a thelemite while he will never be and spoke ill towards the law via his actions... and i know now from that me and him will never be friends
i am sorry for this post but it has been troubling me for years now on why me and him cant be friends..... after years of searching along with trial and error i have found my answer
i am a thelemite while he is not. his actions are against the law.... that i follow....
if you never read the book of the law you will have a hard time understanding me
i will leave the laws below for you to read
1 do what thou wilt is the whole of the law
love is the law, love under will
2 to see your joy is my joy
3 restriction is sin
4 be shameless - this one i infer
there are countless others but these are the main i have memorised
Part 2 - friendships and me
maybe this is why i have litterally no friends and an alien ROLF
why i say this is because every friend i encounter... i have to date or be active in their guild/ clan
since i have been in active in their games i was promptly kicked out
i thought we would message outside the game but i was wrong
as for dates... if you break up they block you
no guy wanted to be my friend unless i dated him
that has somewhat changed in 2018
i write to people when i can
Part 3 - being blocked randomly and how to get blocked by me
it has always been hard for me to befriend people
most of the time i get blocked for litterally no reason at all
one blocked me due to my star sign
another blocked me for when i did not message back on time or some other reason
I usually block people if they ask me out - i am not interested in dating
one man refused to take no for an answer
i have had others chased me like this.. its rare but has happened
i block anyone on facebook if they ask me to see there D or randomly sends a photo.... sorry not interssted in that
needless to say i also decline phone calls from people i dont know... and will block you
i have had strangers hit the call button when they tried to add me.... yeah i dont video chat with anyone
one guy asked me to video chat and i said no and he asked me again....
its rare when i get asked to do video chat...
if i dont know you well and we are not friends... sorry i wont
last time i answered a video chat i was .... raped...
long story short the guy asked me something and i kept telling him off... he lied to me saying he was not masterbating when he was
and since i did not say yes to his request i fet raped
ever since that i decline all video calls from people i do not know and do not trust
how do i know your my friend?
we get along
we talk as often as we can
we have things in common
we vibe with each other
conversation is not one sided only... example... we only talk about sexual things.... sad to say i have had people i thought were my friend but they were fake when i saw we just talk about sex...
you do not disappear on me - you tell me what is going on in your life. if your busy you tell me your busy and i wont hear from you so often... you do not drop out of the blue...
you are not fake - stop messages me for no reason/ stops commenting or interacting with me
you do not ask me out
you do not talk to me about sex only
actual friendship requirement
must be a thelemite - follows the sacred holy books of thelema.. and have read them all....
have things common
we must vibe
interacting with each other - comment messages is what i usually think of.... thats social media for you....
get along is also a huge requirement... i mean it's only natural :P
if you befriend someone it comes naturally... it can not be forced
me i am still searching for the right people that fit me....
i have comment friends - that is a start /wink
i have no game friends except one but we are on opposite sides... so we cant play "together"
i follow people who share similar interests even if we do not speak in messages or comments.... that is fine with me since i love what they post
why am i alone?
no one is on the same path as me lol
have yet to find the right people
i have a tight circle
real friends are better than fakes who lower your energy
i am very selective not by choice since it just happens this way
as i have lost fake friends :P
i feel i am to brutal honest and straightforward
a person even said i was snobby once.... because of it
even with this post of friendship requirement i feel i was to brutal.... and should have not even wrote that in.... only to fix it with the it comes natural and can not be forced...... gosh i must not be from earth lol
i know i am a starseed but still.....
an old soul
a traditional soul
a slow paced person
down to earth
going with the flow
ah yes i am not matched for the times now
a sleeping soul would never be my friend
how can they when they themselves are not open to the astral and ideas of aliens...
i do have one friend who is more physical than spirtual but i still vibe with him
as he respects and is an open mind regardless of his stance in faith... he is nuetral but still has the law in his heart..... to see my joy is his joy....
oh look at me ramble on as i reflect 2018 of my lost friendships
i shall list them now :P
lost friendships
dated a guy
blocked because of my star sign
blocked for not messaging back in a minute of them sending a post
blocked for ranting about how a guy complemented me but i could not respond back? (it pissed me off and for a day i just kept making new explanations on the subject...)
i blocked a guy who asked me out but refused to take no for an answer.
i blocked strangers who asked me to video chat upon accepting their friend request
i blocked a guy for saying... why am i talking to him - age difference
i banned a person for asking if i do dirty web cam shows
i blocked a person asking if they can worship me sexually
i ignored this person saying i have possision of their soul - who also said something else that made no sense
i lost a person upon completing a conversation only to discover it was a sexual based friendship only. a one sided conversation and when it was done no other messages were made to start a new conversation...
i usually lose people who stop writing me without as to why... they could have said they got busy but they dont - however these people are aquiantances and not friends since we never really knew each other well.
oh just the usual stupid nonsense of men talking to me
what else is new?
friendships i have gained - 2018
struck a conversation with a guy upon helping him learn things
i referred him to my blog and videos i have made
we talk on it
even if i forget to go back and respond lol
since i myself have a hard time explaining to a new person on this path
i try to make my blog posts very basic as possible
but since i write from my soul... it goes over his head and i forget to go back and try to explain what i have written
picture quotes i have done in the past and gave my thoughts on it but not very often
i made a new friend
we talk about projects we are making
along with me showing him arts i have have made
he too also encouraged me with my blog and videos
yay i have a commenter friend on youtube
this concludes the reflection on friendships i have made and lost in 2018
may 2019 be better and less lustheads who ask me out lol
should i even be sorry for writing this post?
no?
it is a reflection after all...
look at the progress and lessons learned
keeping the lust heads mostly out of my life
knowing what real friends mean to me
knowing what makes a real friend
vs the bad
vs the low frequency i will have no part in
i say job well done and hello to new friends and acquaintances for the next year
i hope my blog and youtube takes off soon XD
i am happy with the 16 subs i have right now and looking forward to new people
i am not one of those people who goes over board with omg i want 100 subs... omg why am i not having subs.... a person who wants fame rather than a person who is happy with what they have currently
i love the progression and hard work
i am happy with what i have now
i will never let the number of people who follow me go to my head
i will make my own community and it will be amazing
if i get applauds from three people than i can and will acquire more people cheering me on
i am happy with the three i talk with <3
i lost two subs and that is ok
one was my ex friend
another is random
i will continue to try and build my career on youtube and here <3
if it was easy everyone would be doing it
i am blazing my own trail
i am putting in the hard work
i am reaping the rewards daily
i am happy
i am content
i enjoy what i have and what i do
always try and leave on a positive note <3
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